You’ve probably heard of subjects like English, maths, and science, but have you ever heard of something called Social and Emotional Learning, or SEL? It might not be a subject you take in lessons, but it’s just as important. In fact, SEL is all about understanding your feelings, building positive relationships, and learning how to manage your emotions and choices in life and at school.
For young people with Social, Emotional and Mental Health (SEMH) needs, SEL can be especially helpful. In this blog, we’ll explore what SEL is, why it matters, and how it supports students, especially those who face challenges with their emotions, behaviour, or mental wellbeing.
Social and Emotional Learning is the process of developing key skills that help you:
In simple terms, SEL helps you learn how to be aware of yourself and others, deal with difficulties in a healthy way, and act thoughtfully rather than react out of anger, fear, or confusion.
These aren’t just "soft” skills; they’re powerful life tools. The better you are at managing emotions and understanding other people, the easier it becomes to do well in school, get along with others, and handle challenges in and out of the classroom.
Experts have broken SEL down into five key areas. Let’s look at what each one means:
1. Self-Awareness
This is about knowing your own emotions, thoughts, and values, and understanding how they affect your behaviour. It includes recognising your strengths and areas where you struggle.
Example: You notice that you feel really nervous before a test, and you know that this affects how you focus. Being aware of this is the first step to doing something about it.
2. Self-Management
Once you understand your emotions, self-management is about controlling them in healthy ways. It includes managing stress, staying motivated, and setting personal goals.
Example: You feel angry when something unfair happens, but instead of shouting, you take deep breaths and calmly explain how you feel.
3. Social Awareness
This is about understanding others, especially those from different backgrounds or with different experiences. It means showing empathy and respecting others’ feelings and views.
Example: A friend seems quiet and upset, so you check in and ask if they’re okay. That’s social awareness in action.
4. Relationship Skills
These are the skills you use to make and keep friendships, work well in teams, and deal with disagreements in a respectful way.
Example: You and a classmate disagree during group work. Instead of arguing, you both talk it out and find a solution.
5. Responsible Decision-Making
This involves making smart choices based on what’s right and fair. It means thinking about how your actions affect others and planning ahead.
Example: You’re tempted to skip homework, but you decide to do it because it will help you understand the topic better.
Imagine being asked to run a race with your shoelaces tied together. That’s what learning can feel like if you don’t know how to manage stress, express your emotions, or get along with others. SEL gives you the tools to untie those laces and run freely.
Students who develop strong social and emotional skills are more likely to:
Research has even shown that SEL can improve test results and reduce bullying in schools. It helps create a more supportive, respectful learning environment for everyone.
Now let’s talk about SEMH, which stands for Social, Emotional and Mental Health needs. Some students face extra difficulties in managing emotions, behaviour, or mental well-being. These challenges can show up in different ways, such as:
SEMH is a type of Special Educational Need (SEN), and it affects how students feel, think, and behave. It doesn’t mean someone isn’t smart. It just means they may need extra help to manage their emotions and feel safe and supported at school.
For students with SEMH needs, Social and Emotional Learning isn’t just useful; it can be life-changing. Here’s how:
1. Building Trust and Safety
SEL helps students feel more in control of their emotions. When you understand how you’re feeling and why, you’re less likely to feel overwhelmed or unsafe. This is key for SEMH students who may find school stressful or unpredictable.
2. Teaching Coping Strategies
Instead of reacting with anger or fear, students learn how to pause, reflect, and respond calmly. They build habits like deep breathing, talking about their feelings, or taking a short break when things get tough.
3. Improving Communication
Many students with SEMH needs struggle to explain how they feel. SEL gives them the words and confidence to say things like "I’m feeling anxious,” or "I need help with this.”
4. Strengthening Relationships
SEL teaches skills like empathy and active listening, which help students connect with peers and teachers. This can reduce feelings of isolation or conflict.
5. Boosting Confidence and Motivation
By setting goals and recognising their progress, students with SEMH needs build self-esteem and a sense of achievement—even in small steps.
So, how is SEL taught in schools?
Some schools have specific lessons that focus on SEL, sometimes as part of PSHE (Personal, Social, Health and Economic) education. But SEL can also be taught through everyday activities, like group work, discussions, and class rules.
Here are a few examples:
Let’s imagine a Year 9 student called Alex. Alex often gets frustrated in class, especially when he doesn’t understand something right away. He sometimes storms out or refuses to work.
Through an SEL programme, Alex learns how to:
After a few months, Alex is having fewer outbursts. He feels more confident asking for help and is more engaged in his lessons. He still has hard days—but now he has tools to help him cope.
You don’t need to wait for a school programme to start learning about SEL. Here are some things you can do right now:
Social and Emotional Learning isn’t about being perfect—it’s about learning how to grow, connect, and handle life’s ups and downs. Whether you’re dealing with stress, navigating friendships, or just trying to understand yourself better, SEL can give you the tools to thrive.
For students with SEMH needs, these skills are even more important. SEL can help create safer, kinder schools where everyone has the chance to learn—not just about maths or science, but about themselves and how to be part of a caring community.
So the next time someone asks, "What is Social and Emotional Learning?”—you’ll know it’s not just another lesson. It’s the key to feeling confident, connected, and ready for whatever comes next.
