Social, Emotional, and Mental Health (SEMH) needs affect many young people, but there are still a lot of myths that can make life harder for those who have them. These myths can stop you from getting the right help and reaching your full potential. By understanding the truth, we can help you do better both in school and in life.
Imagine this: You’re clever, creative, and full of ideas, but school feels like a constant battle. Teachers might label you as "disruptive” or "lazy,” and you start to believe it. What they don’t realise is that your behaviour is often a way of showing that something deeper is going on: something linked to your SEMH needs.
Sadly, this isn’t rare. Many young people with SEMH needs are misunderstood because of myths that are still believed in schools, at home, and in society. Let’s look at five of the most harmful myths and why they’re wrong.
One of the biggest myths is that children and young people with SEMH needs are just "badly behaved” and need stricter rules. This isn’t true.
When someone is struggling with their emotions, it can show up in ways that other people see as "acting out,” like refusing to do work, shouting, or walking out of class. But these aren’t choices in the same way as deciding to skip homework. Often, they’re reactions to emotions that feel too big to handle.
For example, throwing a book in frustration during maths isn’t just "being naughty," it could be a sign that you’re overwhelmed. Refusing to join a group activity might not mean you don’t care; it could be because you have social anxiety.
If adults only focus on punishment, they miss the real reason for the behaviour. This can lower your confidence and make you feel like you’re "the problem,” while the real issue, learning to manage your emotions, goes unresolved. Over time, this can also make schoolwork harder to keep up with.
Some people believe SEMH needs are just a phase, and you’ll eventually grow out of them. This wait-and-see attitude can mean missing the best time to get help.
When you’re young, your brain is still developing, and you’re learning important skills like how to cope with stress, manage friendships, and handle setbacks. If your SEMH needs aren’t supported during this time, they might get worse, not better.
Instead of "growing out of it,” you might learn to avoid situations that make you anxious or hide how you feel. This might make things look okay on the outside, but inside, you’re still struggling. Problems can build up, leading to bigger challenges like avoiding school completely or feeling very isolated.
Another damaging myth is that if you have SEMH needs, you’re less intelligent or less capable in school. This is simply not true.
Your academic ability and your emotional needs are two different things. You might be amazing at problem-solving, creative writing, or science experiments – but SEMH challenges can get in the way of showing those skills.
If teachers or parents expect less from you because of SEMH needs, you might start expecting less from yourself, too. This can stop you from pushing yourself and discovering just how capable you really are.
Some people think that asking for help with SEMH means you’ll be sent to a different school or removed from your friends. In most cases, that’s not true.
These days, schools are much better at providing help while keeping you in mainstream education. This might mean extra support in class, strategies to help you manage your emotions, or short breaks to help you reset. The aim is to keep you learning alongside your peers while giving you the tools you need to cope.
The real risk comes from not getting help early. Without support, small problems can grow until you’re missing more lessons or finding school unbearable. Early help can actually stop this from happening.
Some people see SEMH support as just a way to "manage bad behaviour.” But good support is about much more than that: it’s about building on your strengths.
Everyone has talents, hobbies, and things they’re passionate about. If support focuses only on what’s "wrong,” it’s easy to forget what’s right. Finding activities you’re good at, whether that’s art, coding, football, or music, can boost your confidence and make it easier to face challenges in other areas.
A good teacher, tutor, or mentor will help you grow in both your strengths and your weaknesses. That way, you’re not just coping – you’re thriving.
The truth is, SEMH needs don’t define you. They’re just part of your story. With the right understanding and support, you can succeed in school, build strong relationships, and achieve your goals.
Here are a few tips:
With understanding, patience, and the right support, SEMH needs can be managed – and they don’t have to hold you back.
